Something between whaahaaaa and wheeheeeee and a new time

Oooh, I just got invited for the second job interview as a follow-up from the last. ‘You are our best option.’Β  Not sure if that is a compliment but I’ll take it as such. πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

Now what? My wish to the universe was indeed a second interview. And I’m currently in the phase of trying to not pay attention to the thought that it would be real strange in this times that I would get a job with the first letter I have sent out after years and years. And now it is actually good that my friends are all in the same line of work because I can check what salary would be ok to ask for. πŸ™‚

Hmmm, suddenly I feel funny about all the time I wasted lately. πŸ˜€ Processes, processes. Ghegheghe. I need to start to believe that I can be happy workwise and that life can be simple. And it is a part-time job so plenty of time to continue the self-help I’m doing now.

This morning I started off with the routine from Donna Eden that I posted yesterday. It feels like it works. I feel more energetic. But that could also be so because I actually did something instead of nothing. Not sure. I’m interested in her way of seeing the world and health and she’s very happy so she must know stuff that other people don’t know. ;-). It is now 4 hours later and I have been watching a lot of her video’s on YouTube. It is AMAZING what she teaches. And the hippo says ‘Yeah! Finally!!’. I guess there must be something in this for me. It combines very nicely with the haptic body work I have been doing years ago. I have done one of the tests with the arm out myself earlier and I know it works exactly as you see it. It is not a scam. I’m gonna get all my girlfriends together and test this out! Wonderful πŸ™‚ Makes me happy. πŸ™‚ It feels as if today I have reached some end point and a new time is approaching. Well, meteorological (is that the word or a word at all?) spring started yesterday so maybe I’m perfectly in sync.

I am happy that I quit drinking alcohol. Thankful to GP1 who so clearly showed me what clarity looked like, thankful for the people at the programme who, by listening without judgement, allowed me to -instead of fight with my self-loathing- come to the point where I could find the love and energy I needed to quit. ❀  ❀  ❀

There are a few things I want to quit doing now too, I think, not sure, letting go is difficult but it is becoming an option… hmmm, those are tapping words. Hmm….. I would like to be able to give up negative thinking but truth be said: I still don’t feel like I have the energy to stop it like I quit drinking. I just want things to be easy. Not sure why, if I zoom into that I feel overwhelmed and tired and hopeless. Hmm, lets tap on that :-D. Negativity, I have been looking into that ever since I got out of the alcohol prison and today again it pops up, of course because of a new situation. It is still my primary reaction.

Yesterday I actually did some meditation and ‘the voice’ in my head said: ‘You need to stop taking care of others.’ Funny because in daily people judgement this is counter intuitive but I feel it is true in the sense that I tend to meddle, that is the part where the care giver misunderstands ‘taking care’. Not sure how to deal with that yet. I guess it is the next big thing now next to being positive.

I want: a tremendous salary, free-floating hours and wonderful colleagues, work that makes me excited.

I need: don’t know yet, admin again. :-(, cleaning.

I take: nothing, a bit irritated with healing that comes from the outside in. Reading books of an old Dutch witch now. Unfortunately she is long dead but I have just re-discovered her. Really enjoying it, well, she says things that agree with my thoughts about stuff so that makes for easy reading ;-). Another wonderful realisation of late: I like stuff that does not contradict me. :-D. It feels very childish but I could also interpret it as ‘going with the flow’. And now I have seen Donna Eden’s video’s I’m sure that going with the flow is very important. Check this out. Donna shows how to test if your ‘strong’ in your energy and then with the one movement takes away the energy from somebody (and restores it later! πŸ™‚ ) If you are in a hurry go to 1:20. In another video she shows that actually looking somebody down can do scramble somebodies energy and looking up to them can strengthen it. Wow! She also tells about the bad effects of shoulder bags and underwired bras on your energy level. I guess this counts for metal wires, not the plastic, but not sure. If you have time I would say: watch and learn and be happy. πŸ™‚Β  πŸ™‚Β  πŸ™‚

Advertisements

Tracing meridians for energy and health

I’ve done this and it feels great. Donna Eden shows how to trace the meridians (energy paths) in the body in order to feel energized. She is one of the speakers on the tapping conference on day 6 or 7, she’s still on now in my timezone. She is in the blue room, scroll down from the red and green room.

I have a new hypotheses: follow the happy people and see where it brings me.

I am happy that I quit, that still works, so that’s good. Had tiny urges last Friday after having done some very dusty and physical construction (well demolition) work at a friends and biking home in the spring sun suddenly made me ache for a beer. Guessing that is how I ‘learned’ to drink: work hard with my parents constructing a new house and drink beer after. Also the energy of nature awakening and the general feeling of ‘spring’ in the air to me is a little unsettling, getting in high spirits that I would usually let go of by drinking a lot, possibly in combination with taking a guy home from a pub. So…. that was informative. I guess I’ll need to keep an eye on that high spirits aspect in the coming weeks/months. Use if for something. Like spring cleaning πŸ™‚ or sports :-).

I want: tot get organised but I still do not want to take that last step where I decide. Maybe, maybe I should take it easy on me and just do a little thing like not

I need: to get organised, and I feel I’m almost ready to accept that. I’m getting frustrated with how little I do in a day, even though I now wake up at 7:00 in the morning.

I want to: get organised but I still do not want to put the effort in. Just waiting for that rock-bottom? Learned a lot from Brad (?) on the procrastinating tapping interview. Where he tells (very free ‘quotes’) ‘While procrastinating we actually think that we take good care of ourselves – that is why and how we hang onto it.’ ‘If we procrastinate seriously we wait for rock-bottom to actually finally take action we are inspired by misery and somehow only think that doing stuff must be miserable’. These insights were (are?) very valuable to me. And now I come to think of it: procrastinating is one of my biggest ‘black holes’. I am so in denial that I do not even look for answers, I might listen if/when they happen to be on my path but otherwise? I can look up 10.001 things on the net, read books but never about this. Very uncomfortable with it. I feel as if I have ‘done so much already’ with quitting drinking.

I take: yeah, well, something funny here, I take Magnesium salt for (against…) a tiny muscle that tics above my eyelid but it is not going away and another effect that should be going away ‘being hungry after a meal’ has suddenly developed. It is strange. And expensive. And fattening :-D. Need to look up how this works. In Bach remedies or homeopathic medicine it can sometimes happen that at first things get worse. That means that the remedy is correct but the dose or strength is not. Hmmm, need to feel into that. Nah, don’t feel like it. πŸ˜€

I hope you have a nice day/evening/morning. πŸ™‚

xx, Feeling