Sat outside, read Nakken and found out what is addictive in this blog. There is addiction in living in the blog, not in the real world. But I’m ok with that now, that’s fine. It has only been 3 weeks, I just need to add more living to my life.
Another part is the way I write. I throw it all out there. No ethics, no censoring (well a little, on my thoughts / fears on AA) and very little to no regard for what other people might feel. I keep peoples feelings in mind when reacting and replying but not in my own blog, does not always work but there is no undo or edit button on the replies. My Publish button is actually called the ‘get it out of your system’ button. It works. But it is using peoples as objects, as
Now there’s a funny thought; I was going to write ‘wall to speak to’. Hmmmm…. sad now.
But that’s what I do, use peoples as a wall to talk to. The intention never starts of with ‘speak with’. Very little speak with. I expect people to talk to me when they disagree or want to tell their story and then I’ll listen, no problem there and that is when things evolve into a conversation. But the mindset is ‘talk to’. Sorry 😦
Guessing this one will stick with me for some time. It’s a family trait. I feel it is about not letting in, no two-way connection. Can I love, yes. Can I believe anybody can love me? No. Little two-way. Loads of closed doors and walls.
So that’s what I need to look into. Hmmm. Discomfort here.
And laugh it off again; just remembered I got this very nice book ‘The fine art of small talk.’ Bought it to develop some small talk skills for business events and seminars etc. very helpful, very good skill development book. Ghegheghe. This book thing is getting a bit strange. Come to think of it, that’s a family trait as well. But why reinvent the wheel? I know how much it takes to become an expert in a certain subject. And I am thankful to those that are experts in their field and share their knowledge and experience in a book, on the net, in groups or personal session, or in whatever way actually. I believe I paid 16 Euro’s for Craig Nakken’s book. It contains a lifetime of experience! Not buying into everything (yet?) but hey, I will not ask my money back for that :-D.
I learn well by reading. Even though it feels like I can hear everybody screaming by now ‘GET OUT OF YOUR HOUSE AND START INTERACTING!’ Yes, yes, I will, I will… 😉