I updated my Linkedin Profile today. That would be step 1. My heart breaks over and over again when dealing with this past in which I used to be succesful and all of which I drank away. It takes a lot of practice to let go of the pain and continue. My short-term memory still sucks, I would assume it would get better in time but often I can’t remember what I had for dinner the night before. Or what I did the day before. I’m guessing it has to do with lack of organisation in my life and my brain but still. It scares me. But, ok, I updated my profile.
I pulled a tarot card today on what my Karma issue was; I got Fortune reversed. That would be accurate. 😀 Not being able to hold on to money has always been a thing. Sigh. Well, better deal with it now than later. I guess when I do so I will be filthy rich in my next life. 😀
I am happy that I quit. Not so much in a happy happy kind of way but more in a ‘a year from now you will be happy that you started today’ kind of way.
I need: to get outside and see if I can get some fresh air.
I want: well, again, I want things to be simple. Wonder why I make such issue of everything if I just want things to be simple?
I take: Schuessler salts against arm pain. It is lessening, also due to my thick selfmade woolen sweater I wear all day now. And I slept a little better. Which is good too.
On discipline: well, I updated my profile. And realised spiritual growth is not a commonly used currency. When I posted that I got reactions from my SIL who really seems to understands shit about the position where I am in saying ‘supportive things’ like ‘just do it’. Thank you. If I could just do it I would just do it. And yes, well, sorry again… it’s just that the ‘help’ I get from that direction has to do with judging me into shape. It doesn’t work. I wish, wish, wish, wish very much that I could learn a LOT from this because it is EXACTLY how I approach people but damn it is hurtful, negative and destructive. 😦 I find it hurtful and I feel I have to guard myself against her too while doing this.
3 Things: well I guess updating my profile, my home sewn warm blanket sweater 🙂 and OOH! Having lost 2 kilo’s without even dieting AND eating about 100grams of dark dark chocolate a day. Must be due to the Ayurvedic pills and possibly the walking I did when my bike was broken. And…. I started of with some meditation this morning; practising to feel and let the feelings be, let them pass as ships on the see, clouds in the sky – no attachment, just picking up the information. Saves a LOT of trouble. Let’s see if that can be brought into a daily routine. Hmmm, maybe I can get a book about it? 😀
🙂 Wishing you a nice day/evening. 🙂