Just how it is…

Yesterday I found out that I had been expecting ‘feeling good’ over the work I put into being sober; ‘I guess I have been expecting that with work comes reward and the reward will make me feel good. But the reward of the emotional work I do is clarity. ‘

During these last months I learned that in my life I was looking for quick and painfree happyness and alcohol was the answer. Realising now that the question ‘give me painfree happyness’ is not what the question should be and the answer be it alcohol or instant feel good reward is not or not per se the answer. The answer is just (?) clarity and growth.

Much like this Dirk-Jan comic:

5 thoughts on “Just how it is…

  1. Oh my gosh I am laughing my a** off. This is hysterical and oh so TRUE. The cartoon is the perfect image for your sober perspective. I remember thinking the same thing around day 90. I wanted a reward, I wanted to celebrate, but the only thing I ever celebrated with was a glass of wine. Suffice to say I had to find a new way to celebrate. Thank you for bringing back this memory. I’ll be smiling all day thinking about the “x.” Very happy to see you coming up on the three month mark. A huge accomplishment. xox Lisa

    Liked by 1 person

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